Camel..Good One..
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 6:27 AM 0 comments
Labels: Joke
LOL
IF YOU yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have
produced
> >enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
> >(Hardly seems worth it.)
> >
> >If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is
produced
> >to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
> >(Now that's more like it!)
> >
> >The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the
body
to
> >squirt blood 30 feet.
> >(O.M.G.!)
> >
> >A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves
to
> >death. (Creepy.)
> >(I'm still not over the pig.)
> >
> >Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour
> >(Don't try this at home,maybe at work)
> >
> >The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached
to
its
> >body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
> >("Honey, I'm home. What the....?!")
> >
> >The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human
jumping
the
> >length of a football field.
> >(30 minutes..lucky pig! Can you imagine?)
> >
> >The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
> >(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)
> >
> >Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
> >(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)
> >
> >Butterflies taste with their feet.
> >(Something I always wanted to know.)
> >
> >The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
> >(Hmmmmmm......)
> >
> >Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than
left-handed
> >people.
> >(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)
> >
> >Elephants are the only
> >animals that cannot jump.
> >(okay, so that would be a good thing)
> >
> >A cat's urine glows under a black light.
> >(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)
> >
> >An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
> >(I know some people like that.)
> >
> >
> >Starfish have no brains
> >(I know some people like that too.)
> >
> >Polar bears are left-handed.
> >(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)
> >
> >
> >Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
> >(What about that pig??)
> >
> >Now that you've smiled at least once, it's
> >yourturn to spread these crazy facts and send this to someone you
want
to
> >bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...In other words, send it
to
> >everyone.
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 6:11 AM 0 comments
Labels: Joke
A Joke - S/W Experience
Once a man went to a Veterinary (Animal) Doctor and
said: Doctor I came on vacation so that I can get treated.
Doctor: I think you should go to the Doctor opposite to my clinic
Man: No, I am coming to you.
Doctor: But, I am a Veterinary Doctor. I am an animal specialist.
Man: I know, but I want you to treat me.
Doctor: I cannot, because you speak like me and think like me which means
you are a human, not an animal.
Man: I know I am same and I am a human but the problem is
> I get up in the morning like a horse
> I go to work like a deer
> I work all day like a donkey
> I wag my tail in front of my manager like a dog
> I play with my children like a monkey
> I am like a rabbit in front of my wife
Doctor asked: Do you work in Software Company
Man: Yes
Doctor yelled: Come Dear, no body will treat you better than me.
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 5:15 AM 0 comments
Labels: Joke
Garfield
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 5:10 AM 0 comments
Labels: Garfield
Link for TULU Songs
To listen TULU Songs Click Here
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 3:46 AM 0 comments
Labels: Tulu
Dilbert
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 3:39 AM 0 comments
Labels: Dilbert
Photoshop, now turned more intelligent...... Very Good one...
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 3:22 AM 0 comments
Labels: Technology
Awesome Dance...
Watch this video...
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 11:06 PM 0 comments
Labels: Entertainment
Personality Test
There are many sites offering free personality tests on the web.
The test is based on the Jung-Myers-Briggs topology which reflects an individual's preferences on four different scales.
A free version of the test can be taken here...Click Here
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 3:54 AM 0 comments
Labels: Entertainment
A Joke- God & Marwadi...!! !
A Marwadi having no child, no money, no home, a blind mother, prays to God.
God happy with his prays, grants him only ONE wish!
Marwadi : I want my mother to see my wife putting Diamond bangles on my Child's hands in our new home!
God : Damn !!! I still have a lot to learn from these Marwadi's
Lessons learnt from the above story:-
Compile all requirements and present in one line rather boring appraiser for long time.
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 2:32 AM 0 comments
Labels: Joke
A Joke- 6 INCHES OFF THE GROUND......
A small balding man stormed into a local bar And demanded, "Gimme a double of the strongest whiskey you got! I'm so pissed I can't even see straight!"
The bartender, noticing that the little man is a bit the worse for wear,
pours him a DOUBLE.
The man swilled down the drink and demanded, "Gimme another ONE!"
The bartender pours the drink, but said, "Now, before I give you this,
why don't you let off a little steam and tell me WHY you're so upset?"
So the man begins his tale: "Well, I am a salesman for this fancy goose
pillows. I got an order and took several samples to an apartment in this
neighborhood. I knock on the door and this woman opens the door. Now,
the lady can't make up her mind, so she asks me to take the samples to
the bedroom and check them there. As I get into the bedroom I hear some
keys jingling, and SOMEONE starts fumbling with the door."
"Well, the woman says, 'Oh my god, it's my BOYFRIEND. He must have lost
his WRESTLING match today, he's gonna be REAL MAD! He won't believe that
you are just a salesman. Quick, HIDE!'
"So, I opened at the CLOSET, but I figured that was probably the FIRST
place he would look, so I didnt hide there. Then I looked under the
bed, but no, I figured he's bound to look there, too. By now I could
hear the key in the lock. I noticed the window was open, so I climbed
out and was hanging there by my FINGERS praying that the guy WOULDN'T
see me."
The bartender says "Well I can see how you might be a BIT FRUSTRATED at
this point."
"Well, yeah, but I hear the guy finally get the door open and he yells
out, 'Tell me, who you been seeing now?'"
"The girl said, 'Nobody, honey, now have a glass of water and calm
down.'
Well the guy starts TEARING up the room. I hear him tear the door off
the closet and throw it across the room. I'm thinking, 'Boy, I'm glad I
didnt hide in there.' Then I hear him lift up the bed and throw it
across the room. Good thing I didn't hide under there either."
"Then I heard him say, 'What's that over there by the WINDOW?' I think
'Oh boy, I'm dead meat now'. But the woman by now is trying real hard to
distract him and convince him to stop looking."
"Well, I hear the guy go into the bathroom, and I hear water running for
a long time, and I figure maybe he's gonna take a bath or something,
when all of a sudden the guy pours a pitcher of scalding HOT WATER out
of the window right on top of my head! I mean look at this, I got second
degree burns all over my scalp and shoulders!"
The bartender said, "Oh man, that would have pissed me off for SURE."
"No," the customer replied, "that didn't really BOTHER me. Next
the guy starts slamming the window shut over and over on my hands. I mean, look at my fingers. They're a bloody mess, I can hardly hold onto this
glass." The bartender looks at the guy's hands and agreed,"Yeah,
buddy, I can understand why you are so UPSET"
"No, that WASN'T what really pissed me off."
The bartender then asked in exasperation, "Well, then, what DID finally
piss you off?"
"Well I was hanging there for hours, and I turned around and looked
down, and...
I WAS ONLY ABOUT 6 INCHES OFF THE GROUND!"
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 9:55 PM 0 comments
Labels: Joke
ForgottenBooks.org
http://forgottenbooks.org/ From here you can read thousands of books FREE online (100% viewable) and purchase the books you like as high-quality paperbacks at wholesale prices.
They are specialized in historical writings, this includes works such as: classical fiction, philosophy, science, religion, folklore, mythology and sacred texts, in addition to secret and esoteric subjects, such as: occult, freemasonry, alchemy, hermetic and ancient knowledge. Fiction and non-fiction books.
It is their mission to find hidden knowledge and preserve lost knowledge, from antiquity to the present day, and make this information freely available to the world. If you like any of our books, they are all for sale on Amazon.com for little over the cost of the printing. Please take a look.
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 9:37 PM 0 comments
Labels: Sites
QuillPad
Quillpad is a free online Hindi typing tool. Now it is very easy to type in Hindi. For example, type 'aap kaise hain' in the text field Click Here. Quillpad will convert it directly into Devanagari script. If you write a word like 'vishesh', first sh should become 'श' and the second sh should become 'ष'. Quillpad will intelligently do that for you. No need to use shift keys or to memorize any key mappings. So 'राष्ट्रपति' can be written by typing 'rashtrapati' or 'raashtrapathi'. Quillpad can also predict if multiple words are possible for your input. You can click on the word to select from those options. In addition Quillpad allows you to type English words freely in between Hindi words. It intelligently transliterates them into Hindi.
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 7:55 PM 0 comments
Labels: Technology
Cool Browser add on
I don't get too caught up in the "hot new thing" on the web. There is just so much stuff out there that is, well, a waste of time. Mostly I see new services and widgets that are neat but don't help you do anything better than before. I found on http://www.cooliris.com/ about 3 weeks ago and have been bragging on it ever since. Basically it is a "3D wall" of images or videos that runs on your browser. I use it on Firefox 3 but it is available on all the other major browsers as well. It makes viewing photos & videos smooth as opposed to the clunky way of I used to search for them one at a time. It works with google images, yahoo images, youtube, myspace, facebook, flickr, photobucket and more.It’s nice to have all the photos in one place to just click through as you please. I can't swear to it but the images look enhanced as well. Using it for youtube videos is even better as you don't have to wait for another page to load before starting your next video. More sites are becoming compatible with Piclens everyday so it should only get better. If you have a giant screen for your PC or connect your computer to your bigscreen TV that just amplifies the experience. Oh yeah, it costs exactly nothing.
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 7:07 AM 0 comments
Labels: Technology
Speech by Thomas Friedman of New York Times....
When we were young kids growing up in America, we
Were told to eat our vegetables at dinner and not to
Leave them. Mothers said, 'think of the starving
Children in India and finish the dinner.'
And now I tell my children: 'Finish your maths
Homework. Think of the children in India who would
Make you starve, if you don't.
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 9:45 PM 0 comments
Labels: Life
Chetan Bhagat's lecture at Symbiosis ******* Keep the Spark Alive ********
Inaugural Speech for the new batch at the Symbiosis BBA program, Pune 23rd June, 2008
By Chetan Bhagat
Good Morning everyone and thank you for giving me this chance to speak to you. This day is about you. You, who have come to this college, leaving the comfort of your homes (or in some cases discomfort), to become something in your life. I am sure you are excited. There are few days in human life when one is truly elated. The first day in college is one of them. When you were getting ready today, you felt a tingling in your stomach. What would the auditorium be like, what would the teachers be like, who are my new classmates - there is so much to be curious about. I call this excitement, the spark within you that makes you feel truly alive today. Today I am going to talk about keeping the spark shining. Or to put it another way, how to be happy most, if not all the time.
Where do these sparks start? I think we are born with them. My 3-year old twin boys have a million sparks. A little Spiderman toy can make them jump on the bed. They get thrills from creaky swings in the park. A story from daddy gets them excited. They do a daily countdown for birthday party – several months in advance – just for the day they will cut their own birthday cake.
I see students like you, and I still see some sparks. But when I see older people, the spark is difficult to find. That means as we age, the spark fades. People whose spark has faded too much are dull, dejected, aimless and bitter. Remember Kareena in the first half of Jab We Met vs the second half? That is what happens when the spark is lost. So how to save the spark?
Imagine the spark to be a lamp's flame. The first aspect is nurturing - to give your spark the fuel, continuously. The second is to guard against storms.
To nurture, always have goals. It is human nature to strive, improve and achieve full potential. In fact, that is success. It is what is possible for you. It isn't any external measure - a certain cost to company pay package, a particular car or house.
Most of us are from middle class families. To us, having material landmarks is success and rightly so. When you have grown up where money constraints force everyday choices, financial freedom is a big achievement. But it isn't the purpose of life. If that was the case, Mr. Ambani would not show up for work. Shah Rukh Khan would stay at home and not dance anymore. Steve Jobs won't be working hard to make a better iPhone, as he sold Pixar for billions of dollars already. Why do they do it? What makes them come to work everyday? They do it because it makes them happy. They do it because it makes them feel alive. Just getting better from current levels feels good. If you study hard, you can improve your rank. If you make an effort to interact with people, you will do better in interviews. If you practice, your cricket will get better. You may also know that you cannot become Tendulkar, yet. But you can get to the next level. Striving for that next level is important.
Nature designed with a random set of genes and circumstances in which we were born. To be happy, we have to accept it and make the most of nature's design. Are you? Goals will help you do that.
I must add, don't just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.
There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.
You must have read some quotes - Life is a tough race, it is a marathon or whatever. No, from what I have seen so far, life is one of those races in nursery school, where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same with life, where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die.
One last thing about nurturing the spark - don't take life seriously. One of my yoga teachers used to make students laugh during classes. One student asked him if these jokes would take away something from the yoga practice. The teacher said - don't be serious, be sincere. This quote has defined my work ever since. Whether its my writing, my job, my relationships or any of my goals. I get thousands of opinions on my writing everyday. There is heaps of praise, there is intense criticism. If I take it all seriously, how will I write? Or rather, how will I live? Life is not to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? It's ok, bunk a few classes, goof up a few interviews, fall in love. We are people, not programmed devices.
I've told you three things - reasonable goals, balance and not taking it too seriously that will nurture the spark. However, there are four storms in life that will threaten to completely put out the flame. These must be guarded against. These are disappointment, frustration, unfairness and loneliness of purpose.
Disappointment will come when your effort does not give you the expected return. If things don't go as planned or if you face failure. Failure is extremely difficult to handle, but those that do come out stronger. What did this failure teach me? is the question you will need to ask. You will feel miserable. You will want to quit, like I wanted to when nine publishers rejected my first book. Some IITians kill themselves over low grades – how silly is that? But that is how much failure can hurt you. But it's life. If challenges could always be overcome, they would cease to be a challenge. And remember - if you are failing at something, that means you are at your limit or potential. And that's where you want to be.
Disappointment's cousin is frustration, the second storm. Have you ever been frustrated? It happens when things are stuck. This is especially relevant in India. From traffic jams to getting that job you deserve, sometimes things take so long that you don't know if you chose the right goal. After books, I set the goal of writing for Bollywood, as I thought they needed writers. I am called extremely lucky, but it took me five years to get close to a release. Frustration saps excitement, and turns your initial energy into something negative, making you a bitter person. How did I deal with it? A realistic assessment of the time involved – movies take a long time to make even though they are watched quickly, seeking a certain enjoyment in the process rather than the end result – at least I was learning how to write scripts, having a side plan – I had my third book to write and even something as simple as pleasurable distractions in your life - friends, food, travel can help you overcome it. Remember, nothing is to be taken seriously. Frustration is a sign somewhere, you took it too seriously.
Unfairness - this is hardest to deal with, but unfortunately that is how our country works. People with connections, rich dads, beautiful faces, pedigree find it easier to make it – not just in Bollywood, but everywhere. And sometimes it is just plain luck. There are so few opportunities in India, so many stars need to be aligned for you to make it happen. Merit and hard work is not always linked to achievement in the short term, but the long term correlation is high, and ultimately things do work out. But realize, there will be some people luckier than you. In fact, to have an opportunity to go to college and understand this speech in English means you are pretty damm lucky by Indian standards. Let's be grateful for what we have and get the strength to accept what we don't. I have so much love from my readers that other writers cannot even imagine it. However, I don't get literary praise. It's ok. I don't look like Aishwarya Rai, but I have two boys who I think are more beautiful than her. It's ok. Don't let unfairness kill your spark.
Finally, the last point that can kill your spark is isolation. As you grow older you will realize you are unique. When you are little, all kids want Ice cream and Spiderman. As you grow older to college, you still are a lot like your friends. But ten years later and you realize you are unique. What you want, what you believe in, what makes you feel, may be different from even the people closest to you. This can create conflict as your goals may not match with others. . And you may drop some of them. Basketball captains in college invariably stop playing basketball by the time they have their second child. They give up something that meant so much to them. They do it for their family. But in doing that, the spark dies. Never, ever make that compromise. Love yourself first, and then others.
There you go. I've told you the four thunderstorms - disappointment, frustration, unfairness and isolation. You cannot avoid them, as like the monsoon they will come into your life at regular intervals. You just need to keep the raincoat handy to not let the spark die.
I welcome you again to the most wonderful years of your life. If someone gave me the choice to go back in time, I will surely choose college. But I also hope that ten years later as well, your eyes will shine the same way as they do today. That you will Keep the Spark alive, not only through college, but through the next 2,500 weekends. And I hope not just you, but my whole country will keep that spark alive, as we really need it now more than any moment in history. And there is something cool about saying - I come from the land of a billion sparks.
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 2:18 AM 0 comments
Labels: Life
A Quality Engineer... Good Joke. :-)
A Quality Engineer married an average girl…
After 24 months of tough life with her, finally Engineer got angry and sent a note to father-in-law stating that
"YOUR PRODUCT NOT MEETING MY REQUIREMENTS".
The smart father-in-law replies,
"WARRANTY EXPIRED. MANUFACTURER NOT RESPONSIBLE"
Posted byPrashanthNaik at 2:14 AM 0 comments
Labels: Joke
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